Y sigue la vida...

I have a feeling this is going to be a pretty long post, just FYI. I always think I just have a few things to write but it turns out I'm pretty long winded. Feels like there is so much going on constantly. Life really doesn’t slow down does it? Another busy crazy week has come and gone, it’s pretty intense. We went to North Carolina this week! The flight was a little hard on me but not as bad as I expected. We flew out Tuesday night and got back into town on Friday. Jason was going out to visit the sales offices in Raleigh and Charlotte so I gladly accepted the invitation to go too.

On Wednesday morning Jason had a meeting so he dropped me off at the mall there in Charlotte and I promptly ran to get a much needed mani and pedi. It was wonderful- super relaxing. (My toes had been looking rather stank lately because it’s just not as easy to reach them these days and for some reason I can’t get my husband to paint me the french tip).
Can I just say I absolutely love that part of the country? It’s so beautiful! I’d live there if I could. And the people are so peachy! I had an interesting epiphany while there. I had a multiple of people stop me at the airport, at the mall, wherever we were, asking me when I was due and giving me that look; you know the one… the hallmark smile, nodding head and twinkling eyes. People were so unbelievably warm and genuine. I had a fabulous time cruising the mall by myself, chit chatting with random women in the restroom or in stores about babies and names and all that jazz. I really felt a few times like any minute I was going to be hoisted up on their shoulders and they would start singing songs all around me about the beauty and awe of child bearing and about me being a sacred vessel of life. My point is, it was just nice. It just doesn’t seem like strangers treat you like that here, especially in Provo where being pregnant actually includes you in the majority of the women who live here, not the minority. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mean to be a wanny, I have had plenty of TLC from my girlfriends and sisters, but I’m talking about the love of perfect strangers.

For example, I was going to get in the dreaded check-out line here at Costco the other day, and had one single solitary item I was purchasing. (I know, you don’t go to Costco and buy one thing- my mistake.) I’m walking up there, well waddling, with no cart, just carrying my one item, a fairly good sized box. I’m already irritated because they don’t have the other things I was looking for and I’m in a huge rush. I’m sweating as well, which makes every situation more irritating. Well, this lady probably in her late 20’s or so completely cuts me off in line. We get there at about the same time, and I know she TOTALLY sees me because she actually hustles up so she can beat me there! I’m not joking! And she had not one, but TWO carts overloaded with crap. Honestly I was boiling. I’m no saint, but I know for a fact that if the situation would have been reversed, I would have been more than happy to let her go first, no matter who it was or what physical condition they were in. But the fact that I’m pregnant just made it all the more pathetic. Needless to say, I had a good cry once I got in the car and felt a little better (gee... think I really am pregnant?), but telling the story kinda ruffles my feathers again.

Anyway, while I was out there I just found myself wishing that strangers treated each other that way in Utah County, or maybe it extends to the west in general. I don’t know. I do know that that southern hospitality just butters me up every time we go out there, not to mention those southern drawls when they talk. So, come on everybody! Let's try to reach out just a little more to others, let's be just a little warmer and more pleasant! We can make the difference!! haha. Seriously though, let's do. Maybe I’m just extra sensitive to it because I’m a really touchy feely person, grew up in a really warm, touchy feely family. When I got home off my mission I went to dinner with my parents and some of their friends who I had not met before, and cried all the way home afterward to my parents complaining about white people because they shook my hand when they met me. All I wanted was a little squench (hug) like they would have done in Paraguay where I had just come from. Was that too much to ask?

Now for an ACS (abrupt change of subject). Have any of you seen or heard of the movie Troll 2? Oh my GOODNESS it was made in 1990 and has been officially dubbed as the “best worst movie ever made”. Suddenly nearly 20 years later it has turned into a total cult classic with a huge following around the world… it was filmed in little Morgan Utah and they had a big screening of it last night up there and Jason, me, Becky and Brandon went up to it. One of my husband’s really good friends from forever ago is a pretty main actor in it, so we had to see it. It was made to be a horror flick, but seriously we laughed so hard. Everybody did. It is the most ridiculous movie I have ever seen, so completely “80’s” and SOOOO BAD that it’s SOOOO GOOD!! The premise of the story is a group of vegetarian goblins (side note- that’s right: goblins. Not trolls… the word “troll” is never even mentioned in the film, no not once. Yet the title of the film remains) who turn people into plants so they can then eat them! Ohhh the acting is so horrendous and the writing and special effects worse… Here are some pics of us with a couple of the “goblins”. Dave, wish you were here. I can pretty much guarentee that this will be your new favorite movie.

Just want to make sure you get a good hard look at that goblin face... cuz these costumes are exact replicas of the ones used in the actual movie.

Seriously, check it out sometime. There are a bunch of ridiculous trailors on youtube to give you a taste. If you ever get the chance, watch the movie. Preferribly, late at night when everything is hilarious, and with a big group of people who appreciate the hidden art in absolute absurdity. You will NOT be disappointed!

Not only is June 21st the longest day of the year, and the first official day of summer, but it also happens to be the birthday of the man I love and adore. It was a perfect day to celebrate the life of my wonderful husband. I'm so glad you were born Jason! Where on earth

would I be without you?

By the way, before I forget I have to really thank all of you for your comments on the last post, I totally needed the pep talk. I am feeling much better than I was when I wrote that post:) Four weeks to go! Can you believe it? My fingers and toes are starting to look like little bratwursts but I am hangin in there and ready to rock and roll whenever she is.

What a sensational week and weekend it was! So crazy busy... I took my last final on Wednesday, moms and pops came into town on Thursday, it was Jason's birthday on Saturday and on Sunday Nessa and Sam blessed little baby Leah in Alpine. We had lots of family in town for the events, it was so wonderful to be all together. I love my family so much and loved having them stay in our home.

We partied at seven peaks for the big day Saturday. It's become Jason's annual tradition to rent out a couple of cabanas and throw himself a big birthday bash. (So much for me ever throwing him a birthday party, he takes care of it himself) And no, I wasn't allowed to go down any slides but I did tear it up in that wave pool and lazy river. It was crazy intense, being slammed around by those unbelievable waves, trying to swim out from under the REALLY big ones. Don't you remember being a kid and really feeling like that? This time around I just sorta sat in the shallow water like a beached whale wondering if the waves were even going or not. Nonetheless it was a most fabulous day!

Here are a few pics from Sunday... the blessing was wonderful and having them here for the weekend was most sublime. Nessa please move back to Utah! Please!?! Little Leah mia is a complete heart throb, I could barely handle it. I miss her so much now that they're gone, it hurts. It really does.

I took about 500 pictures of her, but here are a few of my favorites of the little gem. Scrumptious.

Here are a couple more I took with my phone... I couldn't resist.

What's the world coming to?!

So we had our second prenatal class last night, and I have to admit… I left feeling pretty chapped. Not only did I leave there chapped, I also was in need of a good cathartic cry before bed. It helped. Now I really am not one of those people who get all uptight about stuff, but lately, seems like lots of things have been really chapping me.

Let me set the scene for you. We are sitting there in class with about 30 people or so. The first hour of class we talk about epidurals, pitocin, episiotomies…all that thrilling stuff. I'm thinking not that big of a deal, useful and important information, and what’s his name from the back of the room is even holding down the fake laughing. So we take our little break and then the nurse says that she is going to take half the class on a tour of the hospital and the other half will stay and watch a video, and then we’d switch. It was our turn to watch the video first.

Don’t worry; it was only the most horrifically graphic birthing video I’ve ever seen in my life. Three births in fact. They showed EVERYTHING, up-close and personal. There were gasps and cries of terror among the mothers-to-be in that little room, and about half way through I just put my head down and felt the beads of sweat gathering on my forehead. Tears were shed, yes… but they were not tears of joy. They were tears of horror.

The nurse gets back to the room with the first group, and asks us in her all too chipper voice, “Do you have any questions before we take you on the tour?” There were a few questions from others about forceps and then my hand shot up into the air, I’m sorry but I couldn’t be contained. Jason, kinda joking but mostly serious, even tries to nervously hold my arm down…

“Yes?” she motioned to me, again all too chipper.

“This may be a strange question and I’m not trying to be rude… but what makes you think that showing these videos is a good idea? I mean, what’s the purpose, just to get the dads in the room ready for the gore? Cuz honestly if I’m about to go into a really gory and intense surgery the last thing I wanna do is watch the procedure on film right before it happens to me… Right now I’m about to throw up and pass out.”

There were quite a few chuckles throughout the room but I really wasn't trying to be funny. Worst part about it, the nurse had no idea what to say. She had NO logical explanation as to why ON EARTH these lovely practitioners, probably in every prenatal class around the country, submit us to that. She did however assert, as if I didn’t know already, that “you won’t see any of it when it’s happening to you.”
Yes, that’s actually one of my points. Why would I want to see a close up shot of that happening to another woman when I could have otherwise tried my best to stay ignorantly blissful of the wreckage going on to my body? I don’t want to see the blood and the other strange bodily fluids everywhere. I don’t want to hear to screaming and moaning. At another time in life, maybe I could watch it and think it’s beautiful. But not right now. It hits just a little too close to home right now.

I also think its kinda interesting how some guys (not my husband… we’ve already addressed the issue several times about the right and wrong things to say) think the right thing to say is, “Women have been having babies since the beginning of time… you’ll be fine!!” with a slap on the back. Really? Cuz thousands of men were castrated in the middle ages so they could keep their high pitched tenor voices… the fact that it happened to a lot of men brings you a lot of comfort at the thought of it happening to YOU, doesn’t it? Come on! Be a sport!! Men’s parts have been cut off for just years! Doesn’t that make you wanna just step right up in line?? Now I know that's not quite as natural of a process as child bearing.. ok not natural at all... but still. I think you catch my drift. Hubbies out there reading this blog (and I know there are a lot of you who are undercover blog readers) please please don't ever say that to your pregnant wife. Especially if it's her first.

Ok, I feel a little better after going on my rant. I’m just scared. I know it will all be worth it, truly I do. And crazy enough, I know I will willingly do it all again sometime in the not too distant future. I'm so excited to hold her in my arms. The thought just overwhelms me with glorious feelings! However, from where I stand right now in this ordeal, I am completely and utterly terrified! Is that okay?

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!

What a sensational day to celebrate sensational men! I love you Dad! Of course I had to include one of my favorites pics of you and me...

There are three fathers in particular who mean
the most to me...

Father in Heaven, how is your love for me ever so infinite and ever so present in my life? Ever since I was a little girl I have felt the reality of your existence and felt your presence all around me. I knew I had a relationship with you as a small child and have felt confirmations of your love for me countless times as I’ve grown up. I remember when I was a girl of 8 or 9 when our family was living with Nana and Rooney and I had a series of the same horribly traumatic nightmare for multiple nights in a row. I remember it vividly. I was so terrified to go to sleep each night; so afraid the dream would happen again. On the nights I didn’t go crawl into bed with mom and dad; I remember knowing to pray to you about it. I pled with you every single night for multiple weeks and laid in bed singing primary songs. I always found the comfort I needed to be able to drift off to sleep. I love you so much and am in complete awe at how much you let me know you love me.

Dad, you are one of the best and truest friends of my life. My childhood is filled with memories of laughing and wrestling with you. Since a girl I have also treasured our talks. Some of the most meaningful and instructional conversations about the gospel and life for me have between you and me. I love our talks now when I call you. I loved your letters while serving my mission. You have been a source of constant strength to me and I knew my whole life I wanted to find someone just like you to marry. Last year when I pulled my quad during the NorthStar softball game (so embarrassing… bawling like a baby) I had composed myself enough to stop crying. Jason would ask me how I was doing every time he came on and off the field and I said ok… just trying to tough it out but, seriously, I was in a world of hurt! Then you showed up to the field and in front of everyone I limped towards you and burst into tears like a 5 year old crying harder than EVER as you hugged me and had that nurturing tone of voice so familiar to me. Embarrassing or not, no matter how old I get and no matter where I go you will always be my dad. I love you Dad. Thank you so much for all you’ve taught me and continue to teach me.

Sweetest husband Jason, you are the epitome of everything noble and wonderful I have seen in great men my entire life. I still can’t believe you chose me. Long before I fell in love with you, your character left undeniable impressions on me. There was always a clear sense that you were completely different than anyone I’d ever known. Refined and gentle, honest and kind to everyone around you. You are the most forgiving and empathetic person I know. I’m so excited to watch you be a dad. Some men are just born to be fathers and you are one of them. Every time I feel overwhelmed and afraid about her arrival and about my own frailties as a mom, just that little belly rub from you and the look of anticipation and tenderness you have when you look down at her in there gives me just what I need. The thought that I am not alone and will always have you by my side no matter what is the most glorious reassurance. I have been dreaming of you all my life, and then one day you just showed up. There you were. I love you and treasure you as my husband and very soon to be father of our baby girl. I am eternally grateful for the love we share.

So Lonely for Leah

I'm sorry but I'm completely obsessed with my new little niece Leah Mae. She is just too much. Every time Nessa sends pics I just want to eat her up! My heart swells within my bossom and I can scarcely take it! I can't believe how gorgeous she is. I can't believe how fast she is changing! She is a wee lass of just over 4 weeks old and has already made a stalker out of me. If only Nessa and Sam would just move back to Utah I would be peeping in their windows late at night. They are coming out here in less than two weeks and I CANNOT WAIT to pummel her!! Look at her! Would ya just take a look at her!?!






P.S. Jason and I went to our first prenatal class tonight. It was pretty cool, lot's of people. Except, I don't like fake laughers. The nurse was really good and fairly entertaining but there was this one husband in the back of the room fake laughing at every recycled joke she made. Then I started just anticipating his, "ah- ha- ha- ha," with everything she said. How could that not bug his wife? So I stood up, turned around and told him to freaking put a sock in it. i told him if he made another peep he'd have a lot more to worry about besides his wife going into labor. No... no, I didn't. But don't you imagine doing wild things like that just for the shock value? What would that room full of pleasantly plump preggies and their husbands do?

Someday, after my kids are grown... after we retire... I think I'll become one of those people that do things PURELY for shock value. I'll start just yelling obscenities at random strangers... but I'll tell them JK so it'll be a funny joke. Then I'll just shake my head and say, "Man!! You are so gullible!"

So I have a problem...

I have been outdone by my new neighbor more times than I can begin to count in the one week since we've lived here. Her name is Christina and she is quite possibly the nicest person I have met, and happens to be constantly one-up-ing me. Not on purpose, but it is happening nonetheless. She is due, with her 7th, the same time as me. Every single time we drive home she is working outside in her yard. Big and pregnant and has her gardening gloves on, sweating away in the sun. She was planting strawberries yesterday. What a champ. Another example for you. Last Thursday night Jason and I were hauling one of our first loads of boxes in. I was being extra careful just to handle the small stuff... ya know, plants and light boxes. Next thing I know Christina was here carrying heavier boxes than Jason was, with no ounce of struggle actually. I was so confused! "I've done much harder things than this during my pregnancies," she says to me. Really? Are you kidding me? And then just tonight Jason and I were eating dinner and he looks out the window and says, "Wow there's that Christina outside working again... hauling bricks." Are you freaking serious? Sure enough, precisely what she was doing. I guess that's why right after dinner I shouldnt have been surprised when Jason asked me to help him in with the new chair we just bought that was still in our Denali... a huge rocker/recliner (which I'm thrilled about by the way). Are you kidding? You want me to do what? I can't, I really shouldn't be lifting things... but Christina can probably come help you I tell him. We managed to get it in, and I've got a big bruise on my arm to show for it. Really folks, it's getting out of hand! The hub has always been ultra sensitive but now it's like ever since we moved here, whenever I am just dead tired or claiming pregnancy paralysis, I feel like he just looks across to her yard. I know it's all in my head, but still. Previously, I was even giving myself pats on the back for all the work I've done! I mean, I was having Braxton Hicks contractions the whole weekend we moved because I was on my feet 24 hrs a day. I've made up my mind. I guess I've got to just pull her aside and have a one-on-one with her. Just her and me. In private. I've got to tell her to take it easy. At least around my husband. I think he is having "pioneer wife envy."

P.S. I will stop feeling sorry for myself, here is my new chair. I'm in love with it. It's one of those glider rockers! We got it at I M Home here in Provo, and it was on sale! Isn't she a beaut?!

P.P.S. Who in their right mind was EVER a fan of candid photos?! Jason's family threw me a family shower on saturday (so great, thank you family!! And thank you mom for driving down for it I LOVED having you here!) and here are some of the most awkward shots of me you have ever seen in your life. I debated whether I could bear posting them, but sacrificed my pride and self esteem for your enjoyment. Heinous, Meradith! This camera should have been stripped from Audrey lots sooner.